Friday, February 29, 2008

Leap day is a day of decision

Brandon and Jodie have welcomed any and all suggestions for the name of their newest offspring.

The other brother and sister-in-law have been very tight lipped about the potential name for their newest offspring, and i was just fine with it, UNTIL THE BABY WAS BORN AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE A NAME FOR HER.

Yes, the sweet little girl was born yesterday morning, and as of yet, there is still NO NAME FOR HER. WILL SOMEONE PLEASE GET THIS GIRL A NAME?! She just needs one, really.

As you can see, i feel very passionate about this. Apparently, Baby Girl Cohen could be named any of about 5 names, and i say pick one and get on with it.

Now, i know Paul is a slow decider. It took him a while to choose a wife. It takes him a while to decide when exactly he wants to crush you to smithereens when playing Settlers of Catan, but i think Marissa should really step it up, make a decision, and inform her husband.

Is that too much to ask? Just a name for a child?

I say, name her Judith, after Judy who has graciously volunteered to take me to get my car at the car place today.

How hard was that?

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Bob Barker isn't Dead

I was wondering around the channels this morning, looking for something to entertain me in the vulnerable moments of "I just woke up-ness" and trying to determine how much i really like the Frosted Mini Wheats sitting in my cereal bowl when i found the Price is Right and felt like it would do the trick. The first close up was of a really excited lady, and the second close up was of Drew Carey, pretending to be Bob Barker.

WHAT?! Drew Carey?! Drew Carey of that really bad show entitled The Drew Carey Show? Drew Carey who isn't actually funny enough to be an active participant on his own improv show? (He's an executive producer.) Drew Carey holding Bob Barker's old school microphone?!


And that is all there is to it.

I really don't know how i missed knowing he was going to be the new host. Somewhere in my brain i have a recollection of reading or hearing somewhere that Bob Barker was calling it quits, (or had died) and i kind of assumed the Price is Right would be done too. I figured they would just throw it into syndication. No one can tell a Price is Right rerun from a Price is Right first run anyway. Who watches it enough?

It turns out i was wrong. The lady in the picture seems to know all about it, because she was able to have a shirt made with Drew on it.
I can't believe i am so far behind on my Price is Right knowledge. If this old lady knew about it, what else have i been missing?

Sunday, February 17, 2008

My Grandma is crazy. Tonight we celebrate her birth. The birth of crazy.

Dinner on Sunday is always at 5. Tonight we are celebrating Grandma's birthday. Anyone who is familiar with Grandma or her stories should know what i am probably in for.
I got home from church, checked out the scene, and then got online to talk with my sister in law. The name says, "Briz" but don't be tricked, it's really Jiz. The following is our conversation.

: i don't want to be at grandma's party

she's just crazy

and i have a headache

sometimes i can handle crazy

but not right now

Briz: we just called you guys

are you at home?

4:43 PM me: yes

Briz: she told us that she couldn't talk long on the phone because she was choking on her spit

me: and mom was outside talking to you guys and i was left to talk to grandma

Briz: that is pretty...CRAZY

me: lol

she got mad at dad

Briz: so are you hiding out?

4:44 PM me: yes

Briz: what'd she get mad at?

me: oh, gma said something like, "Jeez, Melanie sure is talking a long time with Brandon. I hardly talked to him at all"

Briz: lol

4:45 PM me: and dad said, "well, you got off the phone in a hurry. it sounded like you didn't want to be talking. you said, "Yeah, Yeah, we've got to eat."

and Grandma said, "No, i DID NOT"

Briz: oh man...I'm dying over here...hilarious

me: and dad said, "Yes, you did, it made it seem like we were going to eat right away"

and then dad rolls his eyes and walks out

4:46 PM Briz: leaving you with her?

in her fiery state?

me: and grandma says, "NO I DIDN"T.. "

and as she is dipping into the salsa, "sailsah" if you're grandma,

4:47 PM she says, "I was CHOKING ON MY OWN SPIT" which she was choking on as she tried to eat her chip and salsa

Briz: it's all coming together

this is hilarious

me: and then she was grumbling, "I have to tell him that is not how i didn't mean this is all so.." and

then she waddles out the door

and i see her approach mom

Briz: this is great

4:48 PM me: and she says something like, "TELL HIM I WAS CHOKING ON MY SPIT"

Briz: you're going to have a most excellent party

we did get that message

me: but i was watching from inside and then decided i was alone, so i should get out of there

so i don't really know what happened next

Briz: are you in your room?

me: yeah

safest there

Briz: you slid out of there quick man!

And that was it. I will have to go out there soon, and face the excitement. But you should know my headache is wearing off. So don't worry too much about me. I thought maybe this would be a nice time to share your favorite stories about my grandma. So please, leave a comment.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I am officially putting in my bid for my new nephew's name: Severus.

Severus Brandon Cohen

It's brilliant.

I know it doesn't follow the one syllable rule that little Sev's parents have been upholding, but i think it is a fine name and should be seriously considered.

Seriously. No, not Sirius, Severus. (okay, i know that was lame, but i just couldn't help it.)

I know i have mentioned this name before, perhaps in a "joking" manner, but now i am in earnest. The more i thought about it, the more it seemed appropriate.

Name your kid Severus.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Happy birthday to me.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

The month of free stuff

I don't know if you know, but i am a member of my local Curves gym.
I was pretty hesitant to join at first, mostly because of all the old ladies i imagined to be there. But mom persuaded me, and now she and i get to work out together with the old ladies. It is a pretty great circuit training workout. I really like it. Curves also has a very positive environment. Everyone knows everyone. At fist i was pretty sure i didn't like that idea, but now i think it is great. Each complete workout is 30 minutes, and they keep track of how often you come. To help build motivation, at every hundred mark that you pass, you get a t-shirt. Well, i had just passed my 50th workout, and thought that was pretty cool even without a shirt, but realized it was way cooler because i got a free old school water bottle!

It is my plan to keep this water bottle forever and when my kids go out to play football or something, I'll say, "Honey, you'll need to take some water!" and hand them this ridiculous water bottle, and they will hate it. And when they try to lose it, i will tell them all about how much that bottle means to me, and how i had to go to Curves 50 times to get it, and that they probably can't even count to 50.
I think it's a pretty solid plan.

Later on in the week of the water bottle, i went to Curves, and they were having a friendly game of "who can toss this light ball into that basket really far away" and i did it! I got to choose between a few prizes, but came away with this nifty magnet:
It looks like i can pop that middle heart out and use the remaining purple part as a picture frame. Brilliant.

Also at Curves, they weigh and measure you each month. The person who has lost the most is the Top Loser of the month, and they get their name in a very prominent position. I walked into Curves the other day and found out the Top Loser was me! WOW! I had no idea! I also had no idea that when you are the Top Loser, you get a free t-shirt! Who knew?!
Not me.
Not me at all.